The first step to helping a friend in an unhealthy relationship is to ask questions. You want to find out information, so asking questions while not casting blame is important. Below are some typical questions you should ask if you suspect your friend might be in an unhealthy relationship. Notice how the questions are asked in a way that is nonjudgmental and will gather important details. The person being asked about could be interchanged with any person.

 

Is your partner/parent/friend very jealous?

• Extreme jealousy is a warning sign of an unhealthy relationship.

 

 

Are you intimidated by your partner/coach/teacher?

• Unhealthy relationships are about one partner controlling the other using fear. If one partner feels intimidated, it means that they might be in an unhealthy relationship.

 

 

(If your friend is injured) Did your teacher/parent/partner do this?

• Physical harm is a big warning sign of an unhealthy relationship. If you see bruises or cuts, be sure to ask your friend how they got them.

 

 

Do you have an equal say in your relationship?

• Healthy relationships are built upon trust and equal say. If one partner does not have an equal say in the relationship, then the relationship might be unhealthy.
• When dealing with a friend who is in an unhealthy relationship with an authority figure, a coach, parent, or teacher, they will not have an equal say. However, you should use your best judgment to determine if the authority figure is overstepping a boundary.